Dear Lila (on your third birthday)

Dear Lila,

 

 

Somehow in the blink of an eye you changed from my little baby to my little lady.

 

 

It seems like just yesterday that in your haste to keep up with your brothers you were learning how to walk at 9 months old. Now your brothers struggle to keep up with you.

 

 

In the last few months you've traded in diapers for big girl panties...

 

 

You've discovered all of the little hairs on your legs...

 

("Mommy! Who put all these hairs on my leg?!" )

 

You've decided that it's a necessity to wear makeup on your eyes every day just like Mommy...

 

 

Your one and only wish of having big girl earrings just like Mommy came true

(and you didn't even cry a single tear)... 

 

 

 And you celebrated your 3rd birthday...

 

 

I think it's fair to say that you've challenged me as a Mother in every way possible over the last 3 years. You have earned your nickname "Lila the Menace" (given to you before you turned a year old) an innumerable amount of times and you continually surprise me every day with what you are capable of. Just last week you put Playdoh up your nose and a bead (on separate occasions), broke one of my dining table chairs and managed to pour an entire bottle of bubbles on my family room carpet. Sigh...

 

Being a Mom is tough business. Some days I don't know if I should scream or cry or laugh, or do all three at the same time. Some days I just long for 10 minutes of sitting in a chair all by myself without a child climbing all over me or needing something. But in my heart, I know I wouldn't give up all the tough days with you for any different life.

The truth is, as tough as this Mom job has been the last three years, the more I get to know you, the more I wish I could be just like you. Like how you are such an awesome problem solver! When we were feeding the ducks at Liberty Park a couple weeks ago and the ducks put their nose in the air and snooted at our bread, you didn't let that get you down. You said, "You know what birds, if you aren't going to eat this yummy, cheap white bread then heck, I'm going to eat it and enjoy it!" That is my girl!

Or like how you just walked in my room a couple minutes ago wearing different pants and when I asked why you changed you said, "Oh, I just fell in the toilet! But don't worry Mommy, my butt isn't all wet anymore." So proud that you know how to take charge of sticky situations!

And I absolutely adore your ability to take your time and smell the roses. Like how when I was trying to rush you along at our trip to Willow Pond this summer and you looked up at me with your angry eyes when I asked you to please walk faster.

I wish I could just relax a little bit more and take more time to enjoy the peace and serenity of the birds and the excitement of balancing myself along the curb.

Let's not forget what an amazing will of determination you have! Like how if your brother's are going to climb to the top of that rope web at the park, then by golly, you are going to figure out how to do it too ALL by yourself...

Yep, Lila and the word fear do not ever belong in the same sentence. You are indestructible!! Want to hold a snake Lila? Well of course I do Mommy!! Boy could I use some of your bravery!

(Don't worry, my husband was kneeling down right next to her and it was a gentle snake used to being held.)

 

Oh how I wish I could steal some of your "I don't care what people think" tenacity. Like how you wore a birthday hat around every where we went for two days straight and instead of getting timid or embarrassed when people stared at you, you smiled and said excitedly, "Look at my party hat!"

Or how in your world, clothing is always optional. Who needs to wear a shirt when you have on a pretty necklace, right?!

And did I mention that no one eats a cupcake quite as fantastic as you do??

Without a doubt, you win the trophy for "Most Fantastic Cupcake Eater."You are adorable!

Do you know how I know God is good Lila?? Because he sent me you! Because he knew that every time I saw you smile my heart would leap out of my chest with joy!
 

It is impossible for me to believe that anyone will ever love you as much as I do. I guess God knew that and that's why he sent you to this imperfect Momma...Because he at least knew that I had a perfect love to offer you.

  

Thank you for being you and for loving me back!

Love,
Mommy
 

The one where I tell you we are all like Mother Ducks

What is it about a Mommy Duck swimming around with her little ducklings that brings such warm fuzzies to the heart?

 

 

You see the fuzzy babies and you can't help but ooooh and aahhhh at their sweetness and pureness.  You watch as they follow Mom's every call and stand by her side for protection and guidance. 

 

You can't help but watch in total admiration for these Mother's who without a doubt, love their sweet babies. Sometimes it's just one lone babe with it's Mother...

Other times it's eight...

 

Whatever the case, they have one common goal and purpose...to protect and care for those babies. I guess in that sense, we Mother's are all a lot like Mommy ducks.

 

 

We have these babies...these oh so precious babies of our own. We look at them and our hearts ooooohh and aahhhhhh at their purity and beautiful innocence.

 

 

We feel this bond within our hearts to them that is bigger than could ever possibly be humanly expressed.

 

And we all have this common goal... To protect them! To teach them! And to love them!

 

 

That my friends is one of the beauties of Motherhood. We are in this together! And I love being on this journey with you. Thank you for being you and for loving your sweet babies! It brings joy to my heart! 

 

When the going gets tough...Play and then play some more!!

I have a toddler...A very busy toddler...I have a dramatic, "I'm going to pee in my pants if I don't get my way and you put me in time out" kind of toddler...Yep, good times!

 

 

I also have 2 boys who are in that "I'm going to complain about every time you ask me to lift my finger and do a chore" phase of their life. I totally remember being there as a kid. (Sorry Mom!)

 

The last couple of months I feel like I have lost my sparkle as a Mom. Ok, maybe I never really had a "sparkle" but there was definitely a spark there. A spark for loving all thing Motherhood. A spark for getting out the camera 24/7 and capturing all those Kodak moments. A spark for cuddling with my kids in my bed at bedtime and reading silly stories. A spark for singing silly songs and dancing like a fool.

 

 

One night I laid in my bed and found myself completely and utterly exhausted, down in the dumps, and just plain old worn out from Motherhood. I was sick of asking over and over again for the kids to help with chores and complain every step of the way. I was sick of sending children to their bedroom for fighting non-stop with each other. I was sick of my unruly toddler finding it necessary to cry over every little thing all day long. I was sick of how many times I had to sweep the floor every day and how no matter how much I tried, the house was always a mess. I was pretty much just sick and tired!  Did you notice the long spurts in my posts the last couple months? I guess you could say depression got the best of me. Suddenly playing Candy Crush Saga felt so much more fun than trying to produce fun activities for my kids. Suddenly bedtime silliness felt old school and every night I just found myself so anxious to reach for my nightstand light so I could close my eyes and forget about the day.

 

To be completely honest, I didn't even realize I was in this state until a couple weeks ago. My husband was on graveyard shift, my boys were both in school in the afternoon and I was left with my Lila who was knee deep in potty training and we were pretty much house bound for a couple days. Instead of being able to leave the house to keep it quiet, I found myself on the front porch with Lila in her underwear. She very well wasn't going to stay entertained by just sitting in a chair so I got out the easel and paints and let her get to work.

 

 

And then suddenly as I watched her paint her pretty little picture outside in her underpants, making a total mess all over the place, I felt a little burning in my heart (a spark) that brought me to tears. There was that spark...That spark that is the joy and absolute heaven of Motherhood! In that moment I realized that turning off the light every night and closing my eyes wasn't going to make my tough days as a Mother any less tough. Trying to beat level 141 on Candy Crush Saga wasn't going to make me smile and make my heart explode with joy like motherhood did. Although the overwhelming feeling of motherhood is what brought me down in the dumps, my lack of "mothering" is what was making me stay there.

 

When the going gets tough Play!!

 

 

...and then play some more!!

 

 

And then at the end of the day when you are exhausted after singing Old McDonald about every animal known to man that isn't even a farm animal and you've got your standing ab routine in by bending over so many times singing I'm a Little Tea Pot, when you reach to turn off that light, you are going to have a smile on your face...and a spark in your heart! 

 

It feels good to be back.

 

 

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Curing the Middle Child Blues

I'm sharing some ideas on "Curing the Middle Child Blues" over at What to Expect today.

 

 

I'd love it if you stopped by!

 

What things have you found that have helped combat a child fighting the blues?

What I Loved about Being a Mom this Week

(Every week I try to reflect on some of the things that made me happy as a Mom that week. It's a great way for me to start the new week with love and gratitude.)

 

This week we had fun crossing several things off of our Fall Bucket List.

 

1. Carving Pumpkins. There were some intense moments of anticipation watching Daddy carve out those pumpkin faces...

 

But we had lots of laughs too!

The pumpkins turned out great this year! We had the boys draw out the face they wanted on a piece of paper and Daddy used it to recreate the face on the pumpkins after the kids were done cleaning them out. Luke's is the one on the top with the alien eyes and no nose. Andy went with more of a traditional Jack-o-Lantern face at the bottom.

 

2. Trick or Treating. My boys are HUGE into Lego Ninjago right now so this year they went as Ninjas. Very simple DIY costumes with a $3 sword purchased at a local grocery store. Their hoods are actually black T-shirts with the neck hole over their face, and I tied the sleeves behind their head to tighten up the mask. They got right into Ninja character when I pulled out the camera. I loved it!

 

Lila got the hand-me-down Lion costume this year that all of my kids have worn. I couldn't get a great picture of her but she was absolutely adorable! She caught right on to trick-or-treating immediately and insisted on going up to every single house, even if the boys were ahead of us. The first couple houses we went to let her pick out her own piece of candy from the bowl so from then on when someone handed her a candy she didn't like, she would reach her hand right into their bowl and grab a different piece and say "Thank you" loudly as she walked away. I couldn't help but laugh at her sweet innocence. She was ever so proud of her bag of candy.

 

3. Playing in a Leaf Pile and taking pictures. Fall colors are my favorite and leaves make such a fun background for pictures. I dressed the boys in matching shirts and we took a trip to Wheeler Farm to soak in the Autumn air and play in the leaves. I let Lila roam free without a stroller and it was a heavenly afternoon!  

Where or where did Lila go??

I couldn't resist showing you Lila's excitement over seeing all the geese. She was one happy girl!

 

What were your favorite moments or activities this week?